I watched a great film at the weekend, The Pursuit of Happyness, and found it motivational and inspiring. The fact that it is based on a true story makes it even more powerful emotionally. I won't spoil it for you by revealing the plot here, but the basis of the film is that whatever happens, never give up, keep on going until you achieve what you want to achieve. Whatever happens, handle it, keep focused on your goal and persist, persist and then persist some more. The film also shows that ultimately we are responsible for ourselves, you are responsible for you, the buck stops with each of us.

Whenever I talk about us being responsible for ourselves, I certainly do not mean that you should only look after number one, that you should become selfish, egotistical and live a hedonistic lifestyle, far from it. What I do mean is that you should look after yourself, which will directly benefit the people who you love and love you, if you have supportive family and friends that's wonderful, and also become more aware of "the buck" and its opposite "blame". If you were late for work or an appointment because of a train journey, was it because you did not allow enough time to get to the station, your fault, or because the rail company cancelled the train, not your fault? If you did not leave enough time then it is no good blaming next door's cat, the price of tea in China or your horoscope for the day, it was your fault. If the train was cancelled then it's not your fault, why should you perhaps allow 2 hours for a 45 minute journey when 99 times out of a hundred the train will run? I strongly believe that we should all know the difference between "the buck" and "blame", it leads to a happier life.

Should we pursue happiness? Absolutely not, no way, not ever. We should always set goals such as to be happier, to be more happy, but we should never ever say to ourselves "I want to be happy". Why? Because if we say we want to be happy the implication is at every level that we are not happy and both consciously and subconsciously reasons come forth to re-enforce why we are not happy right now. Saying "I want to be happy" can actually make you feel worse. So, always say to yourself "I am happy" and make your goal "I'd like to be even more happy".

How can you do this? Be grateful for what you have got in this life right now. If you are on your own without a partner or family, be grateful that you can breathe, see and touch things. Be grateful that music, books or conversation can cheer you up, make you happier. If you have a partner that has stuck by you and with you through thick and thin, be grateful. If you have ended a relationship with someone that couldn't handle the thinnest of thins, be grateful that you are no longer in that relationship and that you are now free to find someone who will love and support you unconditionally. Be grateful for your children and your family. Be grateful for your friends, especially the supportive ones. Be grateful for your parents. Be grateful for anything positive in your life and I promise you, you won't be able to be anything but happy.

Take a moment now or later to close your eyes for a minute or two and be grateful for all the good things in your life. Don't kid yourself or lie to yourself, only think of things that you genuinely appreciate, perhaps not everything mentioned above. If you do this and mean it you will realise that you are happy.

Be happy, it's definitely a lot easier than you perhaps think,

Dave.